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Post by moralhazard on Apr 19, 2019 21:16:46 GMT
Kara just stared at Dhaunmyr for a moment. What was wrong with him? She had come up with the perfect solution for his problem – absolutely the perfect solution – and he was looking at her like – like – like she’d just threatened to punch him and take all his coins.
Either she would defend him, or he would have to. It was, really, very simple, once she’d taken the time to puzzle it out. Bows were well and good – Kara appreciated the value of a good archer very highly – but they didn’t help you much while wandering the street, and one couldn’t be sure that the enemy would stay far away all the time. It was much more sensible to have at least some training in weapons – daggers, she thought, although with the strength in his arms Dhaunmyr could manage something more substantial, if he wanted to.
Except – apparently he didn’t want to. Kara sighed. She shifted a little on the mats that covered the wooden floor of the training area, looking at Dhaunmyr with a disappointed expression.
“Why not?” Kara asked. She paused, looking around, and remembered his earlier desire for privacy. The nearest training room was open, so, without actually waiting for him to reply, Kara trotted into it, assuming Dhaunmyr would follow her in order to argue about this.
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Post by enchilada on Apr 19, 2019 21:37:36 GMT
Dhaunmyr followed, again, not like he had anything better to do — oh wait.
But he’d be lying to himself if he said he didn’t want to stay and hang out with Kara, at the least.
He moved the blocks across, and sighed. “I’m... I’d be awful at it. It would be a waste of your time. Have you seen me? All I’m good for is... I’m not even good at selling my stuff! And that’s my whole life. Everything I do is extremely mediocre at best, and I don’t want you to have to deal with that. So if I end up getting hurt it’s really just natural selection.”
He wanted to believe it wasn’t true, but he’d literally been praised for nothing his whole life. Everything he still found himself doing, he kept incredibly private, because he just didn’t want the criticism, the ‘oh, it’s um. Nice?’, he wanted to keep some enjoyment in something, or at least be able to actually do the things that kept him alive, like shooting, and like selling.
“That’s why I don’t want you to protect me.”
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Post by moralhazard on Apr 19, 2019 21:51:26 GMT
Kara stared at Dhaunmyr. Someone else was needed here; someone who could say nice things and make Dhaunmyr feel better about himself. That someone wasn’t her. Maybe once she could have managed it. Maybe. Kara had never been very good with people, and she knew, now, she was – worse, if anything. She tried to accept herself; she was good at many things. Convincing a stubborn dark elf that he wasn’t worthless wasn’t… Kara didn’t think she should even bother trying. She would probably only make it worse in the end.
Kara scowled. She tugged at the end of her now-much-shorter braid with one hand, running her fingers through the singed end of it, and paced a little back and forth in the training room, fixing a periodic glare on Dhaunmyr.
Finally, Kara turned to face him again. “I don’t care,” She said, decisively, as if that settled the issue. Kara crossed her arms over her chest. She didn’t know exactly what had happened to Dhaunmyr. She couldn’t tell if she’d ever met anyone like him before, because no one else she knew would have admitted to such thoughts. At least, not to her. Kara knew she wasn’t usually the sort to inspire confidences. If these weren’t confidences, then Kara wasn’t sure she was ready to know the sort of thoughts that lurked in Dhaunmyr’s head.
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Post by enchilada on Apr 19, 2019 22:07:42 GMT
He was clearly taken off guard. She really was stubborn. Too stubborn. That was pretty... nevermind.
“You’re not going to listen to me, are you? Well. I did my best to prepare you for the absolute wreck this is going to end up, and you didn’t listen. Okay. Fine.” Dhaunmyr had little choice at this point. He didn’t want to upset her. At least he wasn’t blinded anymore. He didn’t have to squint at all, so his face could completely rest. “I’ll just end up embarrassed and annoyed, you’ll probably be some negative emotion, and then I’ll just move on and visit the next merchant’s guild in the next city.”
“Right. How do you recommend we start? For the record, I really don’t see the point in this.”
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Post by moralhazard on Apr 19, 2019 22:14:46 GMT
Kara accepted Dhaunmyr’s submission for what it was, dismissing the content and the tone evenly.
How to start?
Kara thought back to her own lessons - to being thrown on the ground and hit until she vomited. She looked over at Dhaunmyr. After a moment of deep consideration, Kara decided to take another tack.
Kara stepped forward and grabbed Dhaunmyr’s arm, lightly, hand wrapped around his wrist and holding solidly but not squeezing. She waited, looking at Dhaunmyr, for him to react.
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Post by enchilada on Apr 19, 2019 22:26:53 GMT
Dhaunmyr’s immediate instinct was to shrink back and away, but ultimately lower himself. He didn’t really fight back, in all, he just visibly yielded to whatever she was going to do afterwards. It didn’t instantly come. He peeked up, chin pretty much on his chest, brushing as he turned to the side.
He straightened back up, silent and just looking from side to side, as if hiding the fact he’d just reacted as he did. He finally made eye contact again, then just stared at his wrist with some kind of expectation. Do something or let go, right? He didn’t understand why she grabbed it in the first place. It didn’t seem particularly sensible to do so. What was she hoping he’d do? Wriggle his hand out? But she looked like she’d dislocate his thumb, his wrist, and just about everything else that was around there, and to be perfectly honest he needed those.
He felt stupid for doing what he’d done, Kara certainly saw, but he wished she hadn’t watched him just accept her ‘attack’. But he’d get dragged somewhere by that arm, more often than not, places he was entirely uncomfortable with being in, and if he pulled against it, he’d be hit, with whatever was around. And it wasn’t just a single experience, or just one person, this was pretty much anyone and everyone, and once he was no longer the family scapegoat or a childless consort, it would be him doing it too. Without the fresh perspective, he wouldn’t have really seen anything wrong with that. That was just how life was, it was normal, and nothing would get done otherwise. What that also meant was that nothing would get done if you ever said no, so he didn’t. Dhaunmyr just. Didn’t.
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Post by moralhazard on Apr 19, 2019 22:44:21 GMT
Dhaunmyr shrunk down and away, curling into himself as if he expected - Kara sighed a little. She waited, hoping he would realize he was meant to do something. Slowly, Dhaunmyr came back to his feet, and then just - stood there, looking at her then down at her hand.
Slowly, Kara let go.
After a moment, Kara took Dhaunmyr’s hand in hers and guided it to her wrist, wrapping it around hers. She held on over him for a moment, firmly, then let go, looking up at him for a moment.
“Hold on,” Kara told him, firmly.
Kara took a deep breath, gathering up herself. There was no getting around it. She would need to speak. As a squad leader, she had spoken when necessary and now - it was clearly necessary. “When someone grabs you,” Kara told Dhaunmyr, “they feel powerful. They think they can control you.” She paused, quietly. “They’re wrong.”
Kara looked down at his hand on hers. “If you just want them to let go, try pulling back on the little finger,” she took Dhaun’s on her hand, not demonstrating very lightly, careful not to hurt him. She paused, looking up at him again. “Ready to try?”
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Post by enchilada on Apr 19, 2019 23:09:59 GMT
He watched with intent, flinching or withdrawing his hand slower a few millimetres on occasion, but mostly letting Kara do whatever the hell she wanted. It was almost a default state for him, do whatever the hell you want and he’ll figure out the consequences at some point later.
“I guess but... doesn’t that hurt? I can’t... not you. I just can’t.”
Another minor bump in the road — Dhaunmyr couldn’t hurt Kara, and he couldn’t hurt women. It just wasn’t appropriate, for one, and for two, he’d feel super bad about it. Although he was pretty sure that Kara didn’t actually experience pain, such a small thing wasn’t going to even register in her brain, the act would still threaten pain, right? Unnecessary, unacceptable, not happening.
Interestingly enough, he was finally cutting his words short. It felt pointless to put on falsehood to pad out his protests, and what would they possibly be, but mountains of pathetic apologies? Pathetic! Yeah!! That’s it!!!
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Post by moralhazard on Apr 19, 2019 23:18:56 GMT
Kara pulled her hand back from Dhaunmyr, almost effortlessly. She stared at him, silent, for a long moment, eyes narrowed. Finally she nodded, accepting this reservation as fully as she had accepted everything else.
“Wait here,” Kara stepped out of the room.
Kara returned a moment later with an amused looking man in a tank top and loose pants, slightly sweaty from what looked like a training session.
“Hello,” he said, cheerfully, smiling at Dhaunmyr. “I’m Rolond. Er - Kara said you needed someone to help with self defense lessons?”
Kara crossed her arms over her chest, studying the two of them. Slowly, she unwound herself and extended her arm. “Grab my wrist,” she told Rolond.
Rolond reached out, comfortably grabbing Kara’s wrist, his massive hand dwarfing her.
Kara turned to Dhaunmyr, waiting for his attention. “Like this,” she grabbed Rolond’s little finger and pulled back, sharply - not hard enough to break it, but only because he let go immediately, his hand following hers.
“If they don’t let go, it breaks,” Kara explained. “Now you,” she nodded to Rolond, who reached out to grab Dhaunmyr’s wrist.
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Post by enchilada on Apr 19, 2019 23:54:55 GMT
Dhaunmyr watched, a worried look creeping over his face, although deep down he was really slightly disgusted and uncomfortable. Another creature worth no one’s time of day, of course. But he swallowed that back, it was a horrible way to think about a stranger, especially one who, at the end of the day, suffered this judgement because of people like Kara, not people like himself. It was fucked up.
What else was pretty awful, was the fact this was... necessary. Kara was doing this because he needed to know this stuff. It shouldn’t have been important, and yet, there he was, about to try to pry his way out of a grip for practice or whatever.
“Right... Kara, I. You’re really set on this, aren’t you?”
He took a deep breath, and did as he was told, not so hard, but he wasn’t entirely sure the difference between hard and not, in this case.
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Post by moralhazard on Apr 20, 2019 1:29:18 GMT
Kara met Dhaunmyr’s eyes, calm, determined, and utterly unflinching, and just nodded.
Rolond let go hastily, moving his hand back with Dhaunmyr’s. He shot Dhaunmyr a new and very different look, gaze dropping to his arms. “Yes – uh – I think he’s – got it,” He rubbed the place where his little finger met his palm with one hand.
Kara nodded. That Dhaunmyr’s arms were strong was no surprise to her. “Good,” she said, simply.
Kara extended her arm to Rolond, who grabbed her wrist again. Kara turned to look at Dhaunmyr, unbothered by having Rolond holding onto her in a training context.
“Sometimes you can’t grab hold right away, or they’re strong enough to control you,” Kara explained. “In that case, you want to make it more painful to hold on than to let go.”
“Uh,” Rolond said, abruptly, a worried look crossing his face.
Kara mimed a stomp on Rolond’s foot, hard, then brought her knee up, sharply, stopping just shy of his balls. She lowered her foot back down. Rolond exhaled a soft sigh of relief.
“Being held also puts you at stomach level,” Kara explained. She mimed a strike to the stomach, then leaned forward past Rolond and demonstrated an elbow to the kidneys. “Any – or all – of those will make someone sorry to keep holding.”
Kara gestured to Rolond, who let go and stepped back.
“Try – any of them.” Kara said, even doing her best to sound encouraging.
Rolond nodded, wincing a little, but reaching out to grab Dhaunmyr’s wrist once more.
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Post by enchilada on Apr 20, 2019 15:44:06 GMT
Dhaunmyr paid close, studious attention to Kara’s movements. If he could get this right he could get this over with, and then he didn’t need to be touched by any such creature as Rolond again, although he could sympathise a little, as he was actually being useful.
His wrist was taken again, he was rather loathe to do anything about it, really. Was she expecting him to actually... he didn’t want to hurt anyone, in fact, useless pain was something that he preferred not to inflict, not out of some kind of pacifist heartache, but because it was something a drow... would do. And if there was an easy way to stop being associated with such horrible examples of what elves could be, it was to avoid their actions at all costs.
He could stomp... lightly. Show that he clearly knew what he was supposed to do, but wasn’t out looking to actually inflict any harm today.
So that’s what he did. It was a quick movement, and definitely not hard enough to cause anything more serious than a slight red area for a little while.
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Post by moralhazard on Apr 20, 2019 16:54:24 GMT
Kara and Rolond both accepted the stomp, Rolond with a grin and Kara with a nod, and - waited.
“The others?” Kara prompted. She was quiet for a long moment, looking at Dhaunmyr. He had fought before - he must know that in the adrenaline of the moment, reflexes took over. Knowledge in one’s head was insufficient; the knowledge had to be in your body as well, and that took endless practice. Kara had swung every stoke she could make her glaive a thousand times - ten thousand times - and it was still not enough. One had to train until the body knew what to do without the interference of the mind.
But, of course, it was hard work, and it was clearly hard work that Dhaunmyr was uninterested in. That was fine; Kara would drag him through kicking and screaming, if that was what it took. She viewed this as a task of protection worthy of a devotee of Helm.
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Post by enchilada on Apr 20, 2019 17:29:13 GMT
He gave her a look, one that clearly conveyed how he felt on the matter. “The others,” He mumbled. “I’m really not dressed for this, my trousers are... too tight, specifically around the knee. Only around the knee, actually, but that’s it, uh. The knee. Right.”
It did, admittedly, take him a couple of tries to actually move his leg anywhere near the right position, but he did manage it, eventually. It probably felt longer than it actually took, as pauses often did stretch on an eternity when one had to fill them.
The next was a punch, or at least something far more handsy. Dhaunmyr, although he would have usually outright refused, he simply pouted slightly and extended his free hand towards Kara. “Look! My nails. If they get chipped or broken I’m going to send the bill to your door, okay?” They were nice. Uniform shape and length, actually pretty sharp too, but what he was referring to mostly was the shining layer of black paint he’d applied, along with a small amount of gold leaf, left over from the latest update on his only big painting, which also happened to be the only one that he had kept for more than forty eight hours. Of course, he made out that he didn’t do the lot himself, that they were expensive. Well, the materials were arguably expensive, but the difference between a home job and something you paid someone to do, or at least do well, was pretty vast.
He sighed. Dhaunmyr didn’t have much in the way of experience in hitting people. But he’d seen enough, and felt enough, to emulate it. A soft strike, but one that got the point across, but perhaps not with the best technique. He finally followed on with the elbow, that was perhaps the one he was most comfortable doing. Soft, again.
“Are we done now?”
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Post by moralhazard on Apr 20, 2019 18:12:08 GMT
Kara and Rolond both winced at Dhaunmyr’s punch, although neither said anything, letting him try the elbow first.
Kara rubbed one hand along the shaggy part of her hair, running her fingers against the rough stubble on her scalp. She sighed a little. “You’ll break your fingers that way,” she told Dhaunmyr. Kara glanced down at her own hands, callused and scarred, little nicks and notches on most of the fingers. Her nails were scrupulously clean – Kara didn’t hold with grime under her nails any more than she did with grime on her weapons – but they were rough and ragged, lumpy in a few places from old injuries, with crescent bruises under others. She looked at Dhaunmyr’s hands.
“Elbow strikes might be a better choice,” Rolond suggested.
Kara nodded in agreement, and looked at Dhaunmyr. “You should know – how to punch.” She told him. “Rolond?”
Rolond nodded, evidently knowing what Kara meant. Finally – finally – he dropped Dhaunmyr’s wrist and trotted out of the training room.
“Like this,” Kara extended her hand to Dhaunmyr, thrusting it into his sight. She tucked her four fingers against her palm, and wrapped her thumb over them, across the part that thrust out. Her other hand she made into a flat surface.
“You want to hit with the first two knuckles,” Kara said, looking at Dhaunmyr. “Wrist straight when fully extended.” She demonstrated a slow, careful punch, letting him see how her arm turned so the side of her hand made a straight line from her forearm forward. Her first two knuckles, he would notice, were almost callused, especially between them. “Practice it with me,” she would fix Dhaunmyr’s hand if need be, forcing him to punch outwards a few times with her.
“If you don’t hit like this, you’ll break your fingers and hand,” Kara told him. “With the rings, especially – they’ll hurt you as much as your opponent.”
“Found one,” Rolond reported, cheerfully. He had returned with a small mitt, which he slipped over his hand. It was a glove with a pad attached. He extended it to Kara, bracing himself.
“Watch,” Kara told Dhaunmyr. She turned to Rolond, shifting her stance, and punched the pad with one hand, then the other – very, very slowly at first, but always with the exact same form and technique, always hitting with the first two knuckles. At the end she picked up the pace, finishing with a few punches hard and fast enough that Rolond had to brace with his other hand to avoid being pushed back.
“You might want to take the rings off to practice,” Rolond suggested, smiling at Dhaunmyr.
Kara nodded in agreement, extending a small hand to hold on to the rings – if Dhaunmyr would let her.
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